But, what to do with it? Well, there are weak jokes that I can make above the link which I'll change from time to time. The book contract remark is very weak; it'll be gone soon enough.
I know what I can't do with the mailbox: I will not ever solicit or respond to inquiries made specific legal services. Not that anyone reading this blog would do so silly a thing. I'm anonymous. I couldn't possibly help you, even if you were from Chicago where I live and practice. And my license ends at the borders of the State of Illinois.
So here's what I'm going to do. I'll share some of the things I get from time to time. If there's an idea or a topic you'd like me to discuss, I'm open to suggestion. I make no promises, warranties or guarantees of any kind, either to respond or about the responses I may make. All letters to The Curmudgeon are mine to do with as I please; if I do run with an idea you give me I will be pleased to provide attribution (unless, of course, you request otherwise).
Back in college, when we had a hole on a page and it was the wee small hours of the morning and the paper had to be at the printer by dawn in order to get distributed, sometimes we'd make up a letter to the editor. Or two. We were thouroughly versed in Monty Python. Sometimes one imaginary letter to the editor would respond to the one preceding -- a neat trick if both hadn't been made up entirely. I'm not promising not to make up letters if it suits me. Although I'm pretty lazy... and besides, I have great material to work with -- like this:
I feel very special to receive an invitation like this. Although I'd rather they just sent me the $777. Perhaps if I installed Paypal.... And then there was this email:
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Clearly this blog is starting to have a global reach -- and if I can ever think of a use for flat plastic sheets in my life, I now know exactly where to go. And if you order your flat plastic sheets there, be sure to mention my name; maybe I'll get a commission.
Have a nice day
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But my current favorite email has to be this one:
Marcel will continue to wait a long time. Poor man.In confidence / MarcelMarcel
I am Mr Marcel Kuma from but residing in in Africa. It is my desire to contact you on honesty and sincerity to assist me in transferring the sum of $8,000,000(Eight Million Dollars) inherited from my father late Mr. Kuma to your country for investment. I am motivated in contacting you and hope to gradually build trust, relationship and confidence in you as I get to know you better.
So please I want to know if you will be of assistance but first I want to get to know you better. I am willing to offer you $1,600,000(One Million Six Hundred Thousand Dollars) for your effort input after the successful transfer of this money and investment. Indicate your interest towards assisting me by sending your phone # and address so that I can communicate with you at any time. I will be waiting for your response.
However, what a nice salutation -- "Hello Dear." If I were to respond, I suppose I should have to start my letter, "Hello Snookums." I don't know how we could fail to "build trust, relationship and confidence" if we start speaking to one another like this.
At least this letter is shorter than most of them.