It was all innocent fun... I thought... and then...

A couple of days ago I did a silly post about Internet traffic and how certain key words in posts had generated spikes in my Sitemeter statistics.

Well, not spikes, really, more like boomlets.

OK, barely perceptible ripples -- but that's beside the point. A number of you left comments suggesting other phrases I could use, or that you have used or might use, that might also cause traffic spikes.

May, from about a nurse suggested that I insert the words "naked lawyer" in a post. May, I will do no such shameless thing... or will I?

MJ, of Nurse Ratched's Place recalled that she'd once used the term "hot nurse." The many persons racing to her blog who relied on that phrase in their search argument may have been disappointed to learn that she was writing about an air conditioner malfunction. Now, I've disappointed them yet again.

Chris, of Thermal accused me of "linkbaiting" -- which sounds disreputable, surely, if not downright felonious. But, in due course, he offered a suggestion... which I won't repeat... although his comment remains available for your consideration.

Barb, from Skittles recalled that her husband, Mike, of Mike's Place, once did a "hillbilly name generator" that generated a lot of traffic. Probably from people with at least two first names each.

Ladeedah of La La Land suggested she might try phases like "ufo's abduct talking cat" and "aliens from mars kidnaps elvis."

Elvis' birthday was January 8, the same day the post in question appeared. Coincidence... or not?

I didn't think so either.

Anyway, since it was Elvis' birthday so recently, it seems appropriate to run his picture.

What? You were hoping for a "hot nurse"? Or, gulp, a "naked lawyer?" Please, I'm not that kind of blogger. (Even though Bee, of Muffin 53 -- the Empress, with her new banner and all -- called me a "sitemeter ho.")

And Susan, of stuff and nonsense, chimed in mainly because I'd run a picture of Boris Badenov and used the phrase "Moose and Squirrel."

Well, I used it again.

But, anyway, the three terms that had started all this fuss were "Chrissy Popadics," "basement fusion reactor," and "Dominic the Christmas Donkey." Why this happened I don't know. Perhaps Bobby Griffin of The Bestest Blog of All-Time can explain it. All I know is that the repitition of these these key phrases somehow pumped up the page ratings of the original (very different) posts in which each of these terms appeared. So, in fact, I did generate a little boomlet... most of which arrived via search arguments including "fusion" and "Thiago Olson" -- who really did build a fusion reactor of some sort in his parents' Detroit area home.

I thought this was all very amusing, until I noticed that one of the domain names was "pentagon.mil."

Uh oh, I thought. I've stepped in it now. Heistantly, cautiously, with some budding regret that I may have inadvertanly diverted someone from a national security matter, I clicked for details about this visit... what was the referring URL?

It was... page loading, tension building... Chrissy Popadics.

Ladies and gentlemen, Boise State's own Ian Johnson and Chrissy Popadics. It's still a great story....