Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Youngest Son opines on marriage

We are in full-throttle Wedding Frenzy at the Curmudgeon home these days. As of today, only 11 days remain until I walk Older Daughter down the aisle.

Older Daughter is a tad tense these days.

Tense? When the weather was more humid, you could see the waves of tension preceding her, even before she came into the room. And she and her fiance are arguing over... well... over everything at this point. But some of these disagreements would be expected of almost any young couple on the brink of matrimony... and Older Daughter, with her heightened sense of drama, would be expected to have more than her share.

So I'm not too worried.

The one bit of advice that Long Suffering Spouse and I have tried to impart is that -- however much Older Daughter may think otherwise -- the Day itself is not very important. It's all the days that follow that matter.

Which brings me to Youngest Son.

Youngest Son has a friend. This young man -- we'll call him George -- has been on Youngest Son's baseball teams the past three years. We've met George's father; he comes to most of the games. Long Suffering Spouse and I could not remember seeing George's mother.

Turns out, there was a reason.

George's parents have been going through a messy divorce. George and his father love sports; George's mother does not. George lives mostly with his mother; his father has custody only every other weekend. Youngest Son told us how George recently got in big trouble with his mother for calling his father to talk about the outcome of a recent game. She was angry because it was not one of the designated times for the kid to talk to his father. (I won't vouch for the terms of these arrangements; my source on all this is Youngest Son.)

Youngest Son has seen the tension in our household caused by Older Daughter's pending nuptials. He's also seen the tension in both of George's households resulting from the divorce. I don't think he believes the two are comparable.

A week or two ago Youngest Son told us about another teammate, Herman, whose parents were contemplating separation and divorce. I guess the separation was quickly implemented after Mr. Herman took a swing at Mrs. Herman and Youngest Son's friend Herman intervened to protect his mother.

By high school, with weight training and so forth, athletic kids can intervene fairly effectively.

Anyway, Youngest Son has told us about these troubles with George and Herman and one day recently he summed it all up. "Mom, Dad," he said, "don't get divorced."


Karen said...

Aw, poor kid. He probably need not worry.

sari said...

I think that it doesn't matter your age, most "kids" would agree.

One of my sisters is getting married...there is a lot of drama going on with all of that. Makes me glad I eloped! ;-)