Halloween tagging -- no eggs involved

Doctor Anonymous tagged me with a Halloween-themed 'meme'. Of course, tagging me is probably not all that difficult to accomplish: Not only am I a Curmudgeon, I'm pretty slow-moving besides.

I haven't been big on tagging or being tagged: Seems an awful lot like answering Interrogatories to me. On the other hand, I could prepare answers to these just-for-fun Interrogatories... or real ones. (Imagine a very short moment in time elapsing here.) OK, let's get started:

1. What's the scariest movie you've ever seen?

This is a tricky question. I was so scared by The Birds that I never got all the way through it. Still haven't, in fact. Can you believe that this movie was shown at a day camp when I was a kid? (Neither can I.) I believe the last horror movie I actually paid money to see in the theatre was The Omen -- and, no, not the remake earlier this year. The 1976 original, with Gregory Peck.

I tell the kids I don't need to go to a movie to be scared. I just need to look in my checkbook.

2. What was your favorite Halloween Costume from childhood?

I can't remember. But Long Suffering Spouse and I did attend costume parties back in the days BC (meaning "Before Children" -- please, I'm not that old). I remember I was proud of a Mr. Spock costume I put together. In my imagination I looked something like the picture above. In reality? Well, that's what recollection is for.

And there was a year when LSS and I were still dating that we rented costumes, a George and Martha Washington thing. I didn't get the wig then. (I could probably use it now.... *sigh*).

3. If you had an unlimited budget, what would your Fantasy Costume be for this Halloween?

Bill Gates, Donald Trump -- or maybe Warren Buffet (see left). But the disguise would have to be good enough to fool their respective bankers. Then I'd withdraw a large sum of money... and I'd get away with it too because the disguise would be so good and I'd never tell a soul.

Oh, wait....

4. When was the last time you went Trick Or Treating?

For my own account? Probably *gulp* about 40 years ago. Oh, that can't be right....

5. What's your favorite Halloween Candy?

Yes. "Yes" is what my father would say when asked if he'd like apple or pumpkin pie. Seems appropriate here, too. But nothing with marshmellows or creamy fillings. Or razor blades.

When the kids were little, it was my job to insure the safety of their candy by eating as much of it myself as I could get away with. No burden too big to bear, no sacrifice too great... these are my mottos....

6. Tell us about a scary nightmare you had.

Answering Interrogatory No. 4, supra.

7. What is your Supernatural Fear?

That God doesn't have a sense of humor. Or that He finds mine objectionable.

8. What is your Creepy-Crawlie Fear?

All of them. Perhaps that makes me a wimp. I prefer to think I'm just cautious.

But what I fear most of all is when Long Suffering Spouse senses that there's a mouse in the house. Because then the air is electric with tension until the poor unfortunate rodent is caught and killed. And it's very, very noisy when this happens. And, trust me, LSS knows when there's a mouse in the house. But those are stories for another time. (While you wait, you can always review this very funny story by cmhl. But LSS is even more fiercely opposed to the presence of even the smallest mouse than cmhl was to the presence of that small snake. LSS isn't scared, though, not exactly -- very jumpy, yes, but she is also determined. Insistent. No mouse would have a chance.)

9. Tell us about a time when you saw a ghost, or heard something go Bump in the night.

I'm of Irish descent -- so I'm pretty certain the boundary between this world and the next is permeable. But I can't think of any specific time -- right now -- when I've been visited.

But I can give you a ghost story, sort of: Every year there is a list published in the papers of "the most haunted" cemeteries in America. Last year, Oldest Son was invited to go on a road trip to one such place: Well, it's isolated, you know, in the middle of nowhere. Small. And old. And Oldest Son was interested... until he realized that this was where his grandparents (my parents) are buried.

10. Would you ever stay in a real Haunted House overnight?

Not if I knew it was haunted first.

11. Are you a traditionalist (just a face) Jack O'Lantern Carver, or do you get really creative with your pumpkins?

I'm left-handed and a tad uncoordinated, so I'm lucky if I can carve out even a traditional face.

12. How much do you decorate your home for Halloween?

Not as much as for Christmas. A lot more than we do for Arbor Day.

13. What do you want on your Tombstone?

Vacancy.

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Now, I have a question for Dr. A.

He runs this picture of Bertie Wooster on his blog, but I see no homage to P.G. Wodehouse anywhere.

And such an unflattering picture, too. Bertie looks as though he's spent a fortnight at the Drones Club. I can't imagine Jeeves allowing such a photograph to be circulated. Aunt Agatha would be positively aghast if she saw this image. What's going on here, Doc?

At right we see a picture of Bertie Wooster and the incomparable Jeeves in happier days. Or at least on a day when Bertie is more properly attired.

Actually, the look on Wooster's face suggests that he's receiving bad news. Is this when he finds out about the picture you're running, Doc?