Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Tearing up today's headlines -- Curmudgeon reviews the news

NEWS: Northwestern cancels human sexuality class for the fall term.
Views: Now rich suburban kids will never learn all the deviant sex acts they could have performed with only minor modifications to power tools commonly found in their parents' homes.

NEWS: Illinois congressman does beefcake photo shoot for Men's Health magazine

Views: Peoria Republican Aaron Schock obviously thinks that posing shirtless for a magazine is a better career move than posing shirtless for Craigslist.


Or has Chris Lee already been forgotten?

I think that legislation is urgently needed to stem this tide of shirtless Republicans.




NEWS: Crude oil prices rise -- gasoline prices rise also. Crude oil prices fall -- gasoline prices rise anyway
Views: Instead of running around shirtless, perhaps our legislators could look into this? Gasoline in my neighborhood has been retailing at $4.65 a gallon for several days now.


NEWS: Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich announces presidential bid
Views: Barack Obama still running for reelection unopposed.


NEWS: Oprah's final show coming May 25.
Views: The world may not make it all the way to December 2012.

2 comments:

Dave said...

Nicely done.

sari said...

I think I'm the only woman on earth who doesn't watch Oprah and doesn't care.